my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
dude. I can hear the air.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
