I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
