I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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