I hope mine doesn't look like that
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
