we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
