fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize