so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
