Its about making memories worth repressing
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
