Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
