I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
did you get engaged???
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
