You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
