So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize