DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
