she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
