Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
