Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I am never drinking with the goths again.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
