all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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