Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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