OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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