Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
