I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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