What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
