Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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