it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
