Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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