Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
farters have to be the big spoon...
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
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