A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
