All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
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