shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
and i looked up. we had an audience...
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
The cops high fived after they tackled you
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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