im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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