Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
