Do you still have your period?
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
