Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Randomize