i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize