I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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