let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
