I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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