"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize