Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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