Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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