Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
