Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
false alarm, still single
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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