it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I need water and some morals
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize
