I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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