There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
