As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
