you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Randomize
