I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
