I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
