Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
