Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Ketchup is God's man juice
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
